Would you consider adoption? Do you think that because we are adopted we might make "better" parents to those we adopt?
posted by:
|
Unsubscribed |
-
Re: Would you adopt?
Tue, December 19, 2006 - 2:19 PMI would not adopt, primarily because I have a blood son who is plenty enough for me to handle!! That being said, his bio father is nowhere to be found and I know relatively little information about his history/ ethnicity, etc. In this respect, I think my son and I will share a similar experience and be able to relate to that feeling of "not knowing." Not sure that's a great thing but I do hope the fact that I have struggled with this experience will help my son understand it from a different perspective. I wanted to try to find the answers for my son, to all the questions I have as an adult. I think adoptees understand the importance of knowledge, information, pictures, what ever - to connect them to their bio families and that adoptees who adopt would more than likely do more of the footwork, perhaps participate in more open adoptions, etc. to give their children the tools to deal with the mysteries surrounding it. I'd love to hear more from everyone. Good question Tracey. Thanks for the post!
-
Re: Would you adopt?
Thu, February 15, 2007 - 12:18 PMI would adopt. When I was adopted, the infant mortality rate in my country of origin was 9 out of 10 died before the age of 2. I would adopt because even though I want some blood relatives, I don't feel I need to replicate myself more than once. I would adopt, because by the time I get around to finding partner and having a child, my body not might cooperate. I would adopt because that child and I will have a bond of knowing where we come from is different than other people can comprehend.
It's really expensive to adopt these days...way more than back in 1975... -
-
Unsu...
Re: Would you adopt?
Thu, February 15, 2007 - 3:40 PMWe've recently been doing some preliminary research (we are still VERY much undecided about parenting.) and through Holt, the agency I was adopted the cost will be well over $20k for a child from Korea. Back in 1972 my parents paid $2k for my expenses. I don't know what the cost of living was back then so it may be comparable?
-
-
Re: Would you adopt?
Sun, February 18, 2007 - 5:00 PMEven though I am not in the financial position to do so......I would certainly adopt. I would also become a foster parent. I have so many friends that I have known since I was a little girl go through fertility problems as adults. I have mentioned adoption as an option and the response has not been positive. The thousands of dollars spent on tests and horomones and shots and pills and appointments!
It's interesting to read about the price of a child from Korea. Back in the 60's my parents got my older brother for 50 bucks and then 2 years later my parents wanted me and since they had already adopted from this agency they got a "good deal" on me. (35 bucks, methinks). I would always liken myself to being a clearance item. I'd like to think I am way over that by now but you never know! -
-
Unsu...
Re: Would you adopt?
Sun, February 18, 2007 - 6:46 PMI don't like that for some people adoption is still consider a last resort. There are people I know who have spent so much money on In Vitro, struggled with their pregnancies, reversed vasectomies and still think of adopted children as tainted. It hurts me when I see them taking challenging measures just to concieve children "of their own". I respect and understand people's desires to breed.
Adopting takes work. It takes money, forethought, and it involves a third party deciding whether you are worthy. I wonder if people had to go through the same process to give birth if there would be so many kids born each year? My guess is no.
-
-
-
-
Re: Would you adopt?
Thu, March 1, 2007 - 1:04 PMi know for certain that i would not ever be a good adoptive parent. don't get me wrong - i love being a mother to my biological children, but unless it were a closed adoption, i would be afraid of the birth parent coming to take the adopted child away. one of my many flaws, i guess, is that i think there are too many loopholes in open adoption, but that's just my opinion. my adoption in 1959 was closed and i didn't meet my birth mother until i was 37, and even then, i was not ready.
